Remembering the 2009 Bridgeville LA Fitness shooting committed by George Alfred Sodini.

It’s awful to say, but there have been so many shootings over the last twenty-some years that it’s hard to keep track of them. They all seem to sadly blend together into one tragic ongoing blur.

There have been what I’d call “milestone shootings,” at least to me. Ones that really stand out. The Columbine High School Massacre on April 20, 1999, is the most memorable, and arguably one of the most impactful. I was in high school myself at the time, so naturally it hit home. In fact, earlier that year, a friend of mine had brought in his bow and arrows (minus the arrow heads) for a class presentation where we had to talk about our hobbies. Something he likely would have been arrested for doing just a few weeks later.

Then there’s the 2009 Collier Township shooting that took place at a Pittsburgh-area LA Fitness. Committed by lone nutjob George Sodini, who shot up a workout class filled with mainly middle-aged women, shooting nine, killing three, before putting a bullet in his head.

I remember this shooting particularly because of Sodini’s bizarre and disturbing online ramblings about his frustrations with women as the apparent source of his rage that led to his murderous actions. Here’s what he said in his blog from a December 24, 2008 posting, as sourced by ABC News:

Moving into Christmas again. No girlfriend since 1984, last Christmas with Pam was in 1983. Who knows why. I am not ugly or too weird. No sex since July 1990 either (I was 29). No — — ! Over eighteen years ago. And did it maybe only 50–75 times in my life.

Later on December 29th, he writes:

I actually look good. I dress good, am clean-shaven, bathe, touch of cologne — yet 30 million women rejected me — over an 18 or 25-year period. That is how I see it. Thirty million is my rough guesstimate of how many desirable single women there are. A man needs a woman for confidence.

At the time, Sodini was a systems analyst working at a law firm, with a net worth of about $225,000. An amount which in today’s dollars would be around $325,000. He had a lot of spare time to travel. He mentions in his blog about taking a trip to Los Angeles, and having several weeks off a year. He had by all accounts a successful career and a decent amount of money for his age (48). He lived in a densely populated area. This was a year after the 2008 Wall Street crash, when the tech industry was beginning its parabolic growth trajectory that would see companies like Apple reach trillion dollar valuations. He was in a high-end sector with lots of opportunities for meeting people.

So why all the questionable failures with women? Why the isolation and loneliness? How could a guy go almost 25 years without a girlfriend? Almost twenty years without sex? I remember being equally disturbed and perplexed by this case. And thinking to myself, had this guy never heard of the brothels in Nevada? Had he not heard of escorts? Or places like Bangkok or Amsterdam? For a guy who’s hard up there’s all kinds of ways of finding release. Sex is easy to find. It’s love and quality relationships that are the needles in a haystack. For a guy with money like him there’s always sugar daddying, too. And there’s the traditional routes for meeting people. Churches and bars.

Of course, being married or in a long-term cohabitation doesn’t equal having a good relationship. Most marriages are teetering on collapse, while half ultimately do. Divorce court is filled with the bitter ends of what might have started as a fairy tale. Only the rarest couples seem destined for each other and stick it out for a lifetime. And good for them. The dark reality is the majority of relationships are business decisions with an unknown ticking clock until the unraveling.

I remember this shooting later being used as one of the first examples of “incel” rage and violence. Retroactively used as some kind of harbinger that was to come. A precurser to the much-needed “reckoning” during #MeToo, and the growing chasm between men and women seen now during this Red Pill phase. But is it really? As tempting as it is to accept the incel angle, I’ve never really bought it. A guy might go crazy and go on a rampage over being rejected by a particular woman, sure. Especially if it’s to a hated rival. People have done all kinds of insane things over jealousy. But to go on a rampage over not being married or accepted by women in general just seems a stretch. Especially in recent times, with marriage itself increasingly falling out of favor. This guy was not some knight in the Middle Ages owed a fair maiden for slaying a dragon. He was a computer dude in 2009, a time when you could ring up a blowjob for $150 off Backpage.com.

Sodini adds this in another entry dated December 31, 2008:

My dad never (not once) talked to me or asked about my life’s details and tell me what he knew. He was just a useless sperm doner. Don’t know why, find it fun talking to young kids when I visit someone.

As someone who did not have the opportunity to know his real father while growing up, I can understand the frustration, the anger, the sense of loss, and the humiliation. It’s very demoralizing, and can lead to a catastrophic loss of personal confidence and sense of identity during crucial developmental years. I don’t think modern society really gets that. I think society views men as interchangeable cogs. Widgets without feeling that need to be inserted into place to keep the machinery going. Cannon fodder. It’s even worse the farther down you go on the socioeconomic scale. Most people don’t even realize that most mass shootings take place in the inner city, and are committed by black teens shooting other black teens. Mass shootings committed by white gunmen, while obviously tragic, are actually rare, statistically speaking.

Is that to say that if Sodini had had a better relationship with daddy he would not have turned psycho and brutally gunned down three innocent women? I don’t think it’s that simple. But Sodini was certainly someone who felt disconnected and estranged from society. Caught in a feedback loop of negativity and failure with relationships. Lacking guidance. Point is, Sodini was likely damaged goods from youth, who was set adrift on a river of loneliness and never changed course. For most people they try different things until something swings their way. They try speed dating, hit the dating app lottery, go overseas, or give up altogether on love and just start a hobby or get a pet. They don’t kill. But then for some the frustration builds up with interest over a lifetime, until something snaps. And they do kill.

The LA Fitness shooting is a haunting one because on the surface it feels like Sodini had options. He had good money, a decent job, was physically fit, and seemed self-aware enough to understand his needs. But Sodini felt entitled to a life he did not have, and felt he never could. Who goes around thinking “30 million women” rejected them? That’s a hell of a lot of baggage to be carrying on your shoulders. It’s also ridiculous. Everyone has admirers. Even the Elephant Man.

But ultimately, Sodini hated women, and he hated himself. And unfortunately, there’s not really a cure for that kind of sickness and self-loathing.