The absurdity of the celebrity selfie racket.

Yesterday, Donald Trump spoke at the Bitcoin Conference in Nashville, TN. While there, he held a private fundraising meeting, which had an $844,600 price for a seat at the table with the Republican nominee.

It also included the opportunity for a picture with the former president for the modest price of $60,000.

$60K! That’s almost the price of a Tesla Model X. That’s higher than the median annual wage in the United States. Or enough to buy 25 ounces of gold. That’s a pretty yuge price for a handshake and a selfie.

These ridiculously overpriced photo ops are of course meant for high-rollers to donate to their chosen political candidates’ campaign war chests. God forbid we don’t have wall-to-wall ads telling us if we don’t vote for that person or this person the sky will fall and earthquakes will swallow us into the earth’s core.

I mean, I like Trump, but not enough to give up a down payment on a decent house just to shake the guy’s hand. Even if I was a centimillionaire, I’d have to think long and hard before paying out almost a whole Bitcoin just for a few seconds in the Donald’s presence. Hell, if I was a centimillionaire, I’d probably have already hung out with him anyway at some point.

But hearing about that absurdly high price for a selfie got me thinking about how much celebrities charge for a meet and greet photo op. You often see these types of events at Comic-Cons, like the one Marvel just had in San Diego yesterday. They’re absolutely ridiculous. Grown adults paying good money just to snap a selfie with someone who once put a costume on for six weeks. And it’s expensive as hell just for a ticket to these events, much less transportation, lodging, and all the add-ons.

Salt Lake City has an event called Fan-X coming up in September with a load of celebrity photo ops. For a mere $300 you can get a selfie with Mel Gibson. Do you think an anti-semitic rant comes included, or do you have to pay extra for that?

If that’s too steep for you, you could check out Oscar winning actress Marisa Tomei for $125. For the same price you could meet Anthony Daniels. C-3PO himself! Or how about Elijah Wood for the discounted price of $100?

If $100 is too bougie, you could stick with budget-friendly celebs in the double-digit price range. Ever wanted to meet the T-1000 aka Robert Patrick? Now you can! $80 please. Or how about Levar Burton for some $70 Reading Rainbow and Geordi La Forge nostalgia? There’s Jon Heder for the same price. That’s worth 3.6 Napoleon Dynamite Blu-Rays. A bargain! Or how about Patty Guggenheim for the low low price of $50? Who is Patty Guggenheim? I have no effing idea.

I’ve never been able to understand why people shell out hundreds just to meet some actor or artist of some kind. There are very few artists I admire enough to even want to meet, much less pay good money for the privilege. I’ve met a few celebrities before. It’s nothing special. I met John Kerry in 2004 when he was running for president. And Jerry Springer, when he visited my university for a speech. Nice guys, I guess. But not ones I’d pay to see or hang out with a second. And I got to meet them for free.

How much would you pay to meet your favorite celebrity? Or are you a smart and attractive person instead with a life and things to do?